IntegrityPeople Feel You Before They Hear You

Have you ever been around someone that looked and talked exactly how you think they should but you felt something is just not right?  They seem to carry an image of one thing but in your heart you think, “there’s just something not right here!”  This is because people always feel you before they hear you.  I am convinced that people feel integrity.  There is an innate sense that we all carry, helping us discern between truth and falsehood.  Some people are more in tune with this than others but I believe everyone has an internal sense.  My wife Lisa is amazing with this!  At times, I will ask her to come and meet someone, because I’m not as tuned into this skill as I should be.  There have been times where I thought a person was something and after my wife met them she had a different perception.  She can simply feel integrity.

People Feel Your Character

Integrity is more than what you see on the surface.  It means having your words and deeds match.  It carries the connotation that you are the same with every person in every situation.  This goes beyond reputation.  Reputation is what other’s say about you, but character and integrity is what heaven says about you.  In my younger years I lived for reputation but today as I’ve reached into my forties what really matters to me is what the angels in heaven say about me!  If you lack character or honesty, people will not give you their heart, enthusiasm or loyalty.  The last thing people want is someone that’s fake or two faced.   This is a core reason that people stop patronizing certain businesses.  If they don’t feel like a sales person has integrity they will not do business with them.  People disengage from relationships because of fakeness.  We all make mistakes.  When you mess up simply own up to it.  Don’t cover it, but confront it.  Most of the time people see it anyways so it’s better to just be open.  If you lack honesty or character people will see it.

Character is Developed

In the beginning I was enamored with talent.  I would see people with amazing skill and wanted to be like them.  The older I get, the more I admire integrity.  Your talents are simply gifts that have been given to you.  There are certain gifts you’ve been born with.  Yes, you might have to work hard to hone those abilities but at its core, it’s simply a gift.  God has placed inside of everyone talents, gifts and abilities.  Everyone has them, but not everyone has integrity.  Integrity is a rare commodity in today’s world!  Character is more precise than talents.  Gifts are given, but integrity is developed.  You obtain integrity by making choices that aren’t always easy but you know are right!  You develop integrity by being the same person even when no one else is watching.  You gain integrity by listening to that still small voice in your heart and making the right decisions, not necessarily the popular choices.

When People Feel Your Character, they will help you

Here’s a good way to understand integrity.  If all the laws were abolished, what kind of life would you live?  I believe a person of integrity would be the same with or without the laws.  Here’s an even more personal question:  If there were no speed limits, how fast would you drive?  A person of integrity lives the same way no matter who is watching.  When people feel your integrity and know that you’re honest with them, they will want to help you.  They will want to be a part of your team.  Great people skills are not rooted in driving or manipulating others but grounded in integrity and honesty.  There are thousands of books on managing people but no one really wants to be managed.  People want to be led not forced into compliance.  To become people smart guard your integrity because the number one thing people will not tolerate is phoniness.  Don’t live for reputation, live for what heaven will say about you!

What can you do to increase your integrity?